I hope some of you find this funny. This was my Friday afternoon commute. I was at the LCBO to pick up some wine for a recipe and just because and while I was in line to pay, the clerk, with whom I’m familiar, was flirting with the guy ahead of me. The clerk, a middle aged guy, said to the much younger customer, “that will be $19.80. Ah, 1980, what a year!” The customer, somewhat disinterestedly said, “oh yeah? Why is that?” LCBO said, “because I was fifteen. How old were you?” Customer said, “I wasn’t born yet.”
Burn!
So I’m up next.
Me: Hi, how are you?
LCBO: Delicious. How are you?
Me: Bitter.
LCBO: Oh, I’m sure you taste much better than that!
Had to laugh.
Fast forward a half an hour and as I got off the bus, four bottles of wine in hand, I misjudged the step because the bus wasn’t close to the sidewalk and I went tumbling head-first into the temporary plywood wall around the construction site at the corner. As I was laying crumpled on the sidewalk, still clutching a bag of broken wine bottles, the red liquid slowly seeped and spread across the sidewalk, like blood from my torso. I’m sure passing cars thought they had witnessed someone dying. I wonder how attractive that LCBO clerk would have found me at that very moment? Laying on the sidewalk with a wine soaked brown paper bag in my cement- scraped hands. Delicious!